inarticulate romance
For all that talk about better communication being key to healthy relationships, it’s quite evident from centuries of books and cinema that romance thrives precisely on the lack of clear communication. The absence of words makes room for our imagination. It's similar to the appeal of abstract art. From runaway brides to stolen kisses before a wedding, or even the classic friendship trope where it takes the heartbreak of a third person for you to realise your ‘love’ — stories are littered with poor communication between lead romantics for good reason — drama thrives on the conflict of miscommunication. In the age of information, with therapy-language taking over our lives, it's no wonder we feel an imminent death of the rom-com genre.
it’s simplistic to say that we can spare ourselves a lot of heartbreak and misery if only we spoke to each other more honestly. If we really wanted to escape the drama of dating, we’d have to settle for the dullness of over-communication. There's a choice to be made between absolute transparency and the tease of intrigue. As they say, never let truth get in the way of a good story. We do things for the plot, and love a slightly unreadable flirt. It gives us a narrative arc for our memoir.
as Susan Sarandon put so succinctly in 'Shall we dance', aren't we all just looking for a witness to our lives? We're suckers for a good story, and there are few things more certain than that about being human.